Brilliantly Bonkers British Beer Adverts From The 1980s

News out recently that Hofmiester – the bland, fizzy, weak-as-tea lager from the 1980s – is to be re-launched as a ‘craft beer’ sees The Culture Trip’s food and drink editor come over all nostalgic for the crazy world of 1980s British beer commercials. Prior to the 1980s men, and pretty much only men, drank bitter. Then came an invasion of foreign lagers from all corners of the globe aimed squarely at the younger drinker. Your dad and grandad drank bitter, you and your mates drank lager. If you had your first beer in 80s Britain, chances are it was one of these. Did you know – Culture Trip now does bookable, small-group trips? Pick from authentic, immersive Epic Trips, compact and action-packed Mini Trips and sparkling, expansive Sailing Trips.

Lamot

He-man and Battlecat nip out for a pint, narrated by Alien’s John Hurt, it ends with the line “Taste beyond time, smoothness beyond dreams” – the perfect post Dungeons & Dragons beer.

Hofmeister

A man dressed as a dancing bear was all it took advertise beer in the 80s. Nowadays that’s barely acceptable for a five year old’s birthday party, and it remains to be seen if the new Hofmiester will ‘follow the bear’.

Carlsberg Special Brew

Drunk by that mad mate of your older brother who’s now doing a stretch at Her Majesty’s Pleasure, ‘Brew was, and still is, lethal. Despite this, Waitrose sells it and even offers ’tasting notes’.

Holstein Pils

Drunk by middle class young men who wanted to try and look cool, still available, just. And to think that Holsein Pils once commanded over 50% of the bottled beer market in the late 1980s.

Fosters

Part of the Aussie invasion along with Neighbours, Home And Away, and Dame Edna and pitched to look laid back and cool compared to us up tight Brits.

Castlemaine XXXX

Men, buying loads of beer, drinking beer and driving – all perfectly acceptable in the 1980s. Now, not so much.

Skol

Advertised by a cartoon Viking and his wife, amazingly still available at an underwhelming 2.8% abv.

Harp

Parody of the famous Nescafe adverts that ran throughout the first quarter of our lives. A popular choice for the underage drinker.

McEwans

Lager meets Lionel Richie’s Hello video in this quite frankly surreal advert featuring two clay heads for McEwans. Possibly the work of a stoned art student.

Kaliber

A non-alcoholic beer, no one knew anyone who drank it, despite a massive ad campaign featuring National Treasure Billy Connolly.
The irony of all these beers is that thought they often ‘originated’ from countries such as Australia, Denmark and Germany, they were nearly all brewed under licence in the UK. What we were essentially buying wasn’t so much beer as a recipe and advertising. In the glass, many them looked and tasted very similar (apart from ‘Brew, that’s still evil stuff).

But back to Hofmeister, I asked beer bloggers Boak and Bailey for their opinion on the return of the beer. “This is part of a particular kind of brand revival which has nothing to do with the original beer — it’s being brewed in Germany to a completely new recipe. As with the recent revival of the Watney’s and Whitbread brands, the idea seems to be to tap into some lingering recognition among drinkers who are too young to have ever tasted the originals, but who perhaps vaguely recall seeing the ads on ITV during episodes of Minder.”

But perhaps without these dreadful generic industrial lagers of the 80s and the adverts that promoted them, there wouldn’t have been something for the craft beer movement to rebel against. So here’s to you crappy beer!

What was your first beer? Tell us in the comments below.

Since you are here, we would like to share our vision for the future of travel - and the direction Culture Trip is moving in.

Culture Trip launched in 2011 with a simple yet passionate mission: to inspire people to go beyond their boundaries and experience what makes a place, its people and its culture special and meaningful — and this is still in our DNA today. We are proud that, for more than a decade, millions like you have trusted our award-winning recommendations by people who deeply understand what makes certain places and communities so special.

Increasingly we believe the world needs more meaningful, real-life connections between curious travellers keen to explore the world in a more responsible way. That is why we have intensively curated a collection of premium small-group trips as an invitation to meet and connect with new, like-minded people for once-in-a-lifetime experiences in three categories: Culture Trips, Rail Trips and Private Trips. Our Trips are suitable for both solo travelers, couples and friends who want to explore the world together.

Culture Trips are deeply immersive 5 to 16 days itineraries, that combine authentic local experiences, exciting activities and 4-5* accommodation to look forward to at the end of each day. Our Rail Trips are our most planet-friendly itineraries that invite you to take the scenic route, relax whilst getting under the skin of a destination. Our Private Trips are fully tailored itineraries, curated by our Travel Experts specifically for you, your friends or your family.

We know that many of you worry about the environmental impact of travel and are looking for ways of expanding horizons in ways that do minimal harm - and may even bring benefits. We are committed to go as far as possible in curating our trips with care for the planet. That is why all of our trips are flightless in destination, fully carbon offset - and we have ambitious plans to be net zero in the very near future.