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Things You Should Never Say or Do in the Philippines

Manila, Philippines
Manila, Philippines | © aldarinho / Shutterstock

It has been imbibed in the Filipino culture to treat guests warmly, whether it’s a fellow local or a foreign traveler. While Filipinos are admired for their warmth and hospitality, first-time travelers in the country should know their limits, as there are things better left unsaid. Here are best things and slurs you should avoid saying to any Filipino — else, you’ll offend them.

Don’t say something blunt

Filipinos are usually a timid bunch, and it’s unusual for them to be in confrontational situations. In Philippine psychology, there is an approach called pakikiramdam, which is a way of incorporating someone’s feelings or state of being into your thoughts before performing an action. Try to use this approach before you make a negative remark, and imagine what the other person may feel if you say it. If you think what you’re about to say is too frank, keep it to yourself or rephrase it. This way, you won’t come off as too strong or cocky.

Don’t insult their family members

Family

In a typical household, you’ll notice that Filipinos also live with their extended family members. That’s because Filipinos have strong family ties, so you wouldn’t want to say anything negative about them. Or else, you’d see them fuming. While it’s a common practice among Filipinos to invite guests over for a meal, don’t criticize their mom’s cooking or make unnecessary comments about the food they’ve prepared and cooked for you.

Don’t criticize “Filipino pride”

Not a fan of the popular Filipino boxer-turned-senator whom they call “The People’s Champ,” Manny Pacquiao? Or, don’t like beauty pageants as much as they do? Instead of voicing your opinions about a fellow Filipino, just ask them why they love this particular hero or celebrity. They often look up to these people, who represent “Filipino pride.” You don’t want to start a debate that you won’t win. When it comes to Filipinos who have gained international fame, locals never shy away from exclaiming how proud they are of them.

Don’t make bad jokes

A traveler in a train station

Most Filipinos are onion-skinned. Say a remark that might be interpreted as an insult or an opinion they don’t approve of, and you’ll get a bunch of bitter comments and insults online. As the most active social media users in the world, you don’t want to mess with Filipinos, as racial slurs directed towards them can definitely pose a serious problem. In one instance, a Thai national was deported after calling Filipinos pignoys, or “stupid creatures.” Even if it’s a joke, think twice before saying something that may hurt the nations’ pride.

Don’t ask why they speak English so well

Most Filipinos speak well in English and that’s because it’s their second language. Amidst the different languages in the three major island groups of the country, English is widely spoken because it’s taught at an an early age and has become the medium of instruction in most schools and universities. More than 90% of Filipinos can speak and understand English. Even locals from far-flung areas are able to communicate with foreigners in English. So, don’t ask why Filipinos have fairly-neutral American accents.

Don’t ask if they eat their pets

First of all, it’s a misconception that dog and cat meat is readily available in the country and can be bought in the same way that locals buy pig and cow meat in the market. In fact, it’s illegal to turn dogs or cats into viands that go well with a bottle of beer. If you’ve heard news about an alarming number of slaughtered dogs or cats, it’s because this practice is connected to underground activities. Filipinos don’t eat their pets — no need to ask them.

Don’t bring up stereotypes

Health care professional

Another thing Filipinos don’t want to hear are hasty generalizations and stereotypes. While some Filipinos work abroad as domestic helpers, don’t refer to the general population as maids or servants. Also, don’t assume that if they’re working abroad, their profession is related to caregiving or nursing.

Don’t compare cultures and religion

You’re in the Philippines, and locals will find it annoying if you say something like, “In this other country, it’s so much better because…” Filipinos don’t like to be compared to other nationalities. If you’re in this country, you need to conform to their rules and adjust to how things are done. Religion is also a sensitive topic. Avoid getting into an argument or discussion about religion. While Filipinos are mostly Catholics, don’t expect that each person has the same beliefs or practices.

Don’t ask something too personal

It’s a well-known observation that Filipinos are accommodating to guests, even if it’s the first time they’ve met. However, locals are sensitive when they’re asked questions that they think are too personal. Most don’t want to be open about their personal lives, especially if the question relates to a troubling family situation or something that happened in their past. For instance, don’t ask about their gender preferences and beliefs, unless you have already developed a certain level of camaraderie.

Don’t ask if they’re Asians

Filipinos often get asked whether they’re part of the Asian race, since most foreigners assume that Asians are fair-skinned and have a certain eye shape. While China, Japan, Thailand, and other neighboring Asian countries have locals with these qualities, Filipinos are multiracial — a mix of Asian and European/Spanish groups. That’s because the Philippines has been under Spanish rule for 300 years and long before that, there were already immigrants from neighboring countries. So, don’t ask if Filipinos are Asians because no doubt, they are.

Don’t criticize their culture and heritage

Katipunan (KKK) Monument in Manila, Philippines

If you like their hospitality and warm greetings, reward their genuine kindness by not speaking negatively about their heritage or culture. It would hurt them to hear remarks such as, “I don’t like the Philippines” or “What I hate about the Philippines is…” Filipinos are generally proud of what they can offer other nations and feel ecstatic upon hearing that foreign visitors enjoyed their stay in the country. They’d like to make your stay a truly memorable one and hope that you get the most out of your travel experience in the Philippines.

Don’t insult the country or its people

Malapascua Island, Daanbantayan, Philippines

First and foremost, it should go without saying that you shouldn’t insult your host country, but the Philippines is a bit of a special case. Filipinos are proud of anything and everything Filipino (this is why “Filipino Pride” is a thing), so to say anything that could offend them or the country could be a huge blunder. They tend to be very protective of their country and people, so the slightest criticism could be taken the wrong way. In fact, the Philippines has a growing list of celebrities from whom they’ve either demanded an apology—or worse, declared persona non grata (an unwelcome person)—actress Claire Danes is living proof that it might be better to tread lightly on the criticism. Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t disrespect your elders

Filipinos highly revere their elders, and this is obvious in the way they are spoken to. The words po and opo, for example, are used to show respect. While foreigners are clearly not required to be familiar with the use of such words, the value of respect is still expected from them. One way this can be shown is through a local greeting practice known as pagmamano (mano is the Spanish word for hand). This constitutes a slight bow, taking the hand of the elder, and touching it to your forehead. This act is most commonly done to grandparents, and they’ll likely be pleasantly surprised should it be done to them by a foreigner. Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t use first names to address someone older

Another giveaway that respect is a big deal in the Philippines is the avoidance of being on a first-name basis with someone older. Depending on the age gap, there is a more respectful term to address an older person. There’s ate (older sister) and kuya (older brother), tita (aunt)and tito (uncle), and lola (grandmother) and lolo (grandfather). These titles are used regardless of blood relation, and simply based on how much older the person is than you. The default titles for a complete stranger, say, driving your cab or selling you something at a store, would be ate and kuya. Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t arrive on time

…at least to casual gatherings. Filipinos are notorious for adhering to something called “Filipino time”, which refers to anywhere from a 15-minute to an hour-long delay on the clock. So Filipino events will almost always start at least a few minutes late. Many are trying to get rid of this stereotype and formal gatherings are much more likely to begin on schedule, but don’t be surprised when your Filipino friends are only leaving their homes by the time you’ve gotten to your meeting place. Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t get offended too easily

I know what you’re thinking—Filipinos get offended and immediately declare persona non grata, but everyone else isn’t allowed to? The thing is that Filipinos are mostly very happy, fun-loving people. However, their sense of humor might not always fit yours. As opposed to dry humor, Filipinos usually enjoy a more slapstick, situational, silly kind of humor. So in a circumstance where a local imitates your accent, for example, and proceeds to laugh, this isn’t a form of mockery, but simply a good-natured joke, expressing amusement over something different. It might become annoying to some, but just remember, it’s hardly, if ever, done out of spite. Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t go without prior research

The Philippines is one of those countries many people assume is unsafe due to how it’s portrayed in the media. It’s important to remember that the media tend to magnify the extremes and attention-grabbing events. While there are places in the country best avoided by tourists to be on the safe side, like certain provinces in Mindanao, as long as you travel smartly, taking common precaution, you should be perfectly fine elsewhere in the archipelago. Prior research will help you decide where to go, what to do, and for those whose cultures are extremely different from that of Filipinos’, what to expect. It also won’t hurt to know a few Filipino words to exchange with the locals. They love hearing visitors trying to speak their language (and again, don’t get offended if they respond with laughter—this is an indication of amusement). Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t let the bizarre-sounding food scare you

This will almost always apply to food – and it is a typical Filipino thing. On the one hand, Filipinos are food aficionados. They love to eat and food is a huge part of their culture. And on the other, they are fantastic cooks who don’t let anything go to waste—so brace yourself for dishes made of animal parts you never considered edible. You’ll be in the land of chopped up pig’s face on a sizzling plate (sisig), hard-boiled duck embryo (balut), and grilled chicken intestines on a stick (isaw). If you’re the type to get squeamish quite easily, you might be better off not asking what something is. Just try it and should it not suit your fancy, simply don’t have it again. But do try to step out of your comfort zone. This is the perfect place to channel your more adventurous side. Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t drive in Manila unless absolutely necessary

Instead of sharing the road, driving in Manila feels like Darwin’s survival of the fittest. Not only is it a challenge manoeuvring through the Metro’s complicated routes, the difficulty is upped a level by having to compete with the jeepneys that pull over without warning and the huge buses that swerve carelessly, expecting other motorists to automatically give way. The extreme road congestion and ceaseless rush-hour traffic don’t help much either. So unless you absolutely must, you’ll be best off leaving the driving to your Uber. Recommended by Katrina Escalona

Don’t expect everything to be dirt cheap

Sure, the Philippines is a much cheaper country than the US or many of those in Europe, but don’t assume you’re being cheated just because you’re being charged a bit more than what you hoped for. To avoid a heated exchange with a store owner or a pedicab driver, the best way to go about things is by firmly agreeing on a price beforehand. If they insist on an amount you wouldn’t be happy to pay, simply walk away. When bargaining, pleasantly make your offers and if you’re not happy with theirs, politely decline. Remember, while you’re trying to make a good buy on your end, they’re making a living on theirs.

Considering a trip away and eager for adventure? Try out these amazing tours, trips and experiences in Philippines. Don’t forget to check out the delicious local cuisines with these bookable filipino food tours.

About the author

A writer from the Philippines who loves books and photography. She likes to discover new dishes, explore places she's never been to, and try exciting activities. She hopes to satisfy her curiosity by traveling the world.

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