While this is the kind of article to infuriate true Scotsmen, there is nevertheless much to be said with regards to alpha sporrans. Many men on Burns Night will opt for traditional versions in black leather, but for a truly contemporary take on the most traditional of national dresses, look no further than these Instagram-friendly sporrans.
Skunk fur sporran
Historically heralded as an inelegant choice of fur due to the animal’s distinct scent making skills, skunk fur offers the perfect talking point as you are piped into your supper.
Peacocking is in style, and this Saltire sporran is a sure way to celebrate your Scottish heritage, as well as giving the lassies something to enjoy during your toast.
Irn Bru sporran
Arguably the most traditional of all non-traditional sporrans, this Irn Bru piece pays true homage to clichéd notions of the Scots identity, and the most delicious of fizzy drinks.
Irn-bru sporran, £30
The hand-dyed tan sporran
For those who like arts and crafts, this intricately detailed, hand-dyed sporran offers an easy way to add a bespoke feel to your kilt.
Tan hand-dyed sporran, £220
Vintage 1960s sporran
Prepare for all sorts of inappropriate lunges towards this sporran as guests – particularly those who have over-indulged during the toast to the haggis – become more and more enthralled by the soft texture and sartorial stature of this white rabbit-fur piece.
1960s sporran, £45
Another sporran to encourage further tactile encounters between guests, this über-soft statement piece is the perfect way to attract the lassies during a rendition of Robert Burns’ poetry.
Like the Irn Bru sporran above, but less relevant and much more controversial.
Guinness sporran, £30
Who better to help you give the ‘Vote of Thanks’ at the end of the night than a taxidermy animal strapped to your waist? And for additional novelty, try ‘feeding’ it with leftover haggis and potatoes.