There’s no place like home
You’ll refer to your dorm room as ‘home’ and your family house as ‘home home’.
You’ll learn how to ration
Your shared, overcrowded fridge contents mainly consist of beer and milk. And occasionally, sharing is caring – without the owner knowing about it. Cheers.
Just add liquid
Your cupboards will mainly consist of stacks of Pot Noodles. You’ll wake up at around 1pm and what you’ll have for breakfast/lunch is most likely cereal.
Quick and easy
Your freezer consists of ready-made meals. £1.50 for a lasagne that probably contains horsemeat? Bargain!
Keeping yourself hydrated
The bottom shelf will hold your books. The top shelf will hold your elegant alcohol collection consisting of Lambrini and WKD.
Some people can’t cook without the fire alarm going off
The person whose cooking sets off the fire alarm at ridiculous o’clock in the morning usually becomes the most hated person for the next 24 hours. How on earth they managed to burn toast when they have a toaster with a set timer will forever be one of life’s mysteries.
You’ll be broke
At some point, you’ll ask for change for your laundry, no-one will have it, so you’ll go to the campus shop, where they won’t give you change unless you buy something. Snacking on ready salted crisps does make laundry more enjoyable.
You will think you are the next MasterChef
You will ‘cook’ meals that are worthy of Gordon Ramsay’s kind feedback. When you cook something, ask your roommates to have a bite. Their feedback will most likely be ‘that’s nice’, but if you really want the truth insist you fix up a plate for them…
Personal space is not a thing
Privacy is at an all-time low. The walls are thin, and your walk of shame will be noted.
You will find a new use for the Tesco trolley
One day you’ll find a Tesco trolley abandoned outside your building… a few days later it will somehow become a Fast and Furious vehicle on a night out.
Be wary of the walking dead
When you see someone passed out in the hallway, walk past them, taking care not to disturb them cause you’re considerate like that.
Communication is important
You will read some passive aggressive Wi-Fi names in your time at halls. ‘Do-the-Dishes’ is often one of them.
That annoying kid with the drum kit? Yes, he will use it after midnight. Also that other guy with the Xbox set in his room? His room becomes the regular spot for the guys.
A party needs nothing more than good speakers
The parties seem to always sort themselves out without any prior planning. Halloween, Christmas party, Freshers week…the list goes on.
Your mum may be a nag, but you will miss her
When your bin is overflowing, your laundry isn’t done, your cooking is bad… you appreciate mum. (Off topic note: Call her!)
No, but really, living in a student hall can be one of the best experiences of University life. You won’t want to miss out! Check out University Cribs to find the perfect accommodation for you.